emo

lately being thinking too much again...
before that, i knew i am always been think of negative things
until that day i did the test of personality test, the result showed i am always worry...
as i reflect to myself, i realised i am worry too much which leads to i will think of negative things...
sometimes, i really do not know how long i can stand of this...
sometimes, i do think of suicide...
however, i do object of doing suicide, i do hate of people who using death to escape the problem...
yet, my physical and mentally could not take it...

next week tuesday, i will go for my first session of counseling...
though i am not sure whether it is right thing for me to do or not though i am a future psychologist...
maybe i am used to close my heart to myself and now i had to share with someone..
i might afraid he/she will laugh at me...
there are a lot of people told me not too think too much, i am also hoping i could do that
but, the thoughts are like automatic comes into my mind...

today, i wrote this post, actually it is crossing the line i set up for myself way back then...
i do hope the counseling session could help me...