should i let you go?

i just smurfs you a lot

but i can't be selfish

you are tired

should i just let you go?

i think i am terrible lover

sorry

i think i should think bout it seriously

thankiew for smurfing me too

i truly thanks you for smurfing me for all these while

now i know i can't find someone better than you

but it is not your fault

is me

i just want to be selfish

but i know i can't

smurfs you a lot

with my whole heart

but smurfs can't make it right

i am confused now

i just want you

but i can't be selfish

what can i do?

sorrrrrrrry

i feel stress but i don't have anyone to turn too

i feel all the weights are on my shoulder

i almost fall

i don't know how long can i still stand

i really wanted this friday to come yet this friday will be my doomed day

i am scare

but i got no one to turn too

i just want someone to help me

i felt everyone are thinking that i am superman

can do my own

i want someone to care too

i am tired

physically and emotionally

:(

........................................

i realised i am not hating iphone

it just that i scare the application that u can use

i'm forever keeping my angel close.

are u the one who really loves me?

are u the one who really be there when i really need u?

would u be the one who shares my happiness, sadness?

would u be the one who is going to wipe away all my tears when i cry?

would u be the one who going to laugh with me till i old?

would u hold my hand till i die?

would u care about me when i needed someone to care?

i would.

i would do everything for u.

if u love me, i will love u with all my life.

i don't care bout others

i just care bout u.

2.28

am i good?

i don't know what i did is good or bad

i don't know whether the way i treat u is good or bad

i don't know whether do i kill u with my love

i don't know should i just continue with this love or not

i don't know

i love u

but all i can see is i am creating all the problems that lead to both of us suffering.

is it this what i want for us?

do i want u to be sad?

do i really love u or does my love cause u hurt?

i am confuse now

i am not clever

i am the most stupid person

sorry that i am not clever person

i know u like clever person

sorry

1.31am

my love causes pain

 break up?

final option?

lately being thinking a lot

why would keep you together if you are not loving me any more

you are not happy and i am not happy

i always thought love you to the fullest will ensure us to have happiness

you said you still love me

and i know

i can feel it

but i sometimes will think negatively

actually

is not your fault

i mean you are suitable to be in relationship

is me

you know

the things i want

the things i keep demand

is me

is me not suitable to be in relationship

you are right

loving someone shouldn't change him/her

love the way he/she is

but i am keep changing you

maybe i need to ask myself

do i really love you

or do i just wanna change you to become the person i wanted

at this moment

i ask myself

if you wanted to break up, can i accept?

and i told myself to accept it

all i know i want you to be happy

i don't want hurt you again

because of me

you had been sad for so many times

and i am feel sad too

i am angry with myself

if really break up

definitely i will sad

but we still need to face it

....

6.01am

i ask myself today

what is love?

is love means to be with you or it means to let you go?

or just pretend not to know?

love?

it is weird

it makes us to happy yet sad

love also makes us greedy

the memories

bittersweet 

there are part of you and i

they are our memories

time flies

and we know each others well

the habits, the behaviours, the likes, the dislikes, the mood

why need to search for another one since we already started to know each other?

what causes us to be like that?

is it the fights?

or is it we are not meant to be together in the first place?

love is really weird

it can make us can't sleep at night just to think about the other half

it can make us to be moody

yet

love can make us smile when we are together with each other

i am still confused

in the end

what is love?

it seems complicated

maybe i am still immature

can't understand it

or maybe i am not ready for love yet